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Category: enemy mode

The Bog of Despond, Part 1 of 6 – Middle Recovery

The Bog of Despond, Part 1 of 6 – Middle Recovery

Discovery, disclosure, and polygraph are all terribly painful. However during that season, there can be hope for a better future. Also, we have a team of professionals on board to help us get to the other side. Often we’ve even been promised that if we make it through to the other side of disclosure, we’ll have a marriage far better than what we thought we had before Dday. Usually partners decide the new-and-improved relationship is worth the pain that accompanies…

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Nice Guy or Something Else? Summary

Nice Guy or Something Else? Summary

Part 1 – Videos on Nice Guys and Pseudo Alpha Males Part 2 – Personality Structure Part 3 – Personality Disorders Part 4 – The Spectrum of an Abuser Part 5 – His Double Life, Her Cognitive Dissonance Part 6 – More on My Story’s Tipping Point Part 7 – Tips for Her Part 8 – Tips for Him While I was writing this series I saw these socks for sale (post photo)! We know better, ladies. Being a so-called…

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Nice Guy or Something Else? Part 4 of 9

Nice Guy or Something Else? Part 4 of 9

Part of what is so maddening about being in recovery with a nice guy is that you’re confronted with what looks like very kind and mature behavior alongside things like deception, betrayal, and even harmful behavior. Here is one duped wife’s account. Many unhealthy folks engaging in the latter kinds of things you can see coming from a mile away. Their lives are littered with broken relationships, immaturity, and aimlessness. Society hasn’t caught up to the notion that one can…

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A Scary Movie and Other Spooky Stuff

A Scary Movie and Other Spooky Stuff

Today is Halloween. Going through betrayal changes your emotional DNA. What other people call “scary” is child’s play for a betrayed wife. Conversely, simple things like a day at the beach or a commercial can scare the wits out of us – amiright? However, some things that most people find frightening and bizarre, we might understand. Hitchcock’s classic thriller would be the perfect example. Studied for decades, this horror flick is more than a cinematic masterpiece. Hitchcock is actually spot…

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Addiction 101, Part 10: IA and RCs

Addiction 101, Part 10: IA and RCs

One of the most awkward and painful experiences for a parter healing from betrayal trauma must be attending weddings. We see the groom pledging his undying love and commitment to the giddy, believing wife. “I will always be there for you. I will serve you. I will never tire of gazing into your eyes. Every morning I will make you coffee and every night I’ll let you cry on my shoulder.” It’s even more awkward when you’re trying to help…

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