Hi Friends, I can’t believe I haven’t written since January! I think about you, our journeys, and the truths we share here often. I had a very busy Spring with work. Over the summer I got to teach some material that I love – not recovery/infidelity related. I enjoyed it tremendously. Fall is always busy for our family. Lots of hustle and bustle around here. But I’m glad to be back, and I want to tell you I have a…
Part 1 – Videos on Nice Guys and Pseudo Alpha Males Part 2 – Personality Structure Part 3 – Personality Disorders Part 4 – The Spectrum of an Abuser Part 5 – His Double Life, Her Cognitive Dissonance Part 6 – More on My Story’s Tipping Point Part 7 – Tips for Her Part 8 – Tips for Him While I was writing this series I saw these socks for sale (post photo)! We know better, ladies. Being a so-called…
As I share about this season in our story, I feel the tone getting darker. I do believe there is hope, but recovery journeys can get worse before they get better. Ours did! And I think it needed to be that way to uncover real roots of the addiction. I don’t think many partners are prepared for that to happen, and it does quite a bit. If you need hope around this issue, hang with me. I promise in a…
Part of what is so maddening about being in recovery with a nice guy is that you’re confronted with what looks like very kind and mature behavior alongside things like deception, betrayal, and even harmful behavior. Here is one duped wife’s account. Many unhealthy folks engaging in the latter kinds of things you can see coming from a mile away. Their lives are littered with broken relationships, immaturity, and aimlessness. Society hasn’t caught up to the notion that one can…
Wow! This podcast episode by Helping Couples Heal is on point regarding feeling stuck! Marnie and Duane hit the nail on the head.
It’s been a long time since I’ve written a post for you. Jane requested a post on 1, 2, 3…so here I am, sitting and writing about something I noticed in him, but did not notice in myself until I was asked about it. Most of you have read some of my posts and know that my marriage is in its 3rd decade. You know that I was blindsided in 2018 with a therapeutic disclosure wherein my “husband” shared all…
Nothing can compare with those early days of being stuck in a Dday nightmare: you can’t sleep, you cry all day, everything you have cherished and worked for is forever changed. You’re wrecked, and this is not hyperbole. Then with some work, life finds a certain rhythm again. Nothing like your former life, but more stable than in early recovery. If your recovering marriage is anything like mine at the 3+ year mark, it’s stable but kind of lonely. He’s…